The Niggardly Son: A Leftist Parable

Apparently, according to leftists and New Keynesians, being prodigal is a virtue. So if being prodigal is a virtue, what of its opposite? And if Jesus really were a socialist, how different would the parable had been?

The Parable of the Niggardly Son.

Once upon a time, there was a man who had two sons. One day, he decided it was time to give each of his sons their share of the estate. So he divided all his property between them.

“While he’s been selfishly inhibiting circular flow, have I not been helping it along with my drinking and debauchery?”

The first son was prodigal, and immediately set about spending his newfound wealth. This greatly pleased his father, as it meant that the resulting increase in GDP would stimulate the economy. But the second son was niggardly. He selfishly liquidated his assets and placed them in sound interest-bearing investments, greedily hoarding his wealth and decreasing aggregate demand through the Paradox of Thrift.

He went out from his home and spent many years away, amassing a great fortune, placing himself in the hated 1%. Until finally, one day, he returned.

As he approached his boyhood home, his father saw him, and ran to him and put his arms around him. The first son, the prodigal son, who initially didn’t realize what was going on having been in the middle of a particularly raucous night of economic stimulus, saw his brother returning, and became angry.

“Father!” he shouted, with a prostitute on each arm. “All these years I have obeyed you! I have given up selfish greed and avoided recession and sticky prices by spending whatever money I could at the time. I have renounced Say’s Law. I have sacrificed greatly by going into debt to help keep enough inflation going to grow the economy. I have given token amounts to the poor so that they may eat for another day. I have obeyed you in all things! But now this son of yours comes home, and you just welcome him, despite the fact that he has forsaken all that you have taught us?” Continue reading

2014 Just Isn’t Realistic

Hi, um, it’s Ian, uh, Ian Kilhansel of Bogus Publishing Group, and, uh, I got your manuscript in for your futuristic novel, 2014, set 30 years in the future.

“I mean, you’d have to be pretty dumb to fall for that.”

And, don’t get me wrong, we are wanting to work with you and we think you would be a good novelist for us and we could make a lot of money publishing your novels, but this manuscript as you’ve sent it to us, well, frankly, it needs a lot of work.

Continue reading

Jesus vs. Doctor Who

Phil “The Bad Astronomer” Plait says that this is the “Best. Web. Comic. Evah.” As a fan of both the Bad Astronomer and Doctor Who, you know I’m hardly going to disagree!

Part 1

Part 2

“I’ve seen him.

“He’s like fire, and ice, and rage. He’s like the night, and the storm, and the heart of the sun.

“He’s ancient and forever. He burns at the center of time and he can see the turn of the Universe.

“And he’s wonderful.”

Okay, so I’m no Monty Python

I was actually kinda proud of that little mock commercial…but then Eric Idle (of Monty Python fame) had to go and one-up me (actually, it’s more like four- or five-up me). His latest song criticizing current US policies is both hilarious and to the point. You can listen to it here (3MB mp3 file) (WARNING: this piece contains a lot of words that some listeners, particularly Republicans, might find offensive. You have been warned).

Think of the Children

There’s been a lot of to-do in Charlotte about the speeding scameras. I normally don’t comment on Charlotte issues, since I don’t live there and haven’t worked there in a couple of years. But something about this issue was just too irresistable.

See, the profit-mongers in Charlotte GovCo swear up and down that the new speeding cameras, to become operational next month, aren’t a revenue generation method…but then they turn around and say that the revenues generated will go to the school system. People like that are just begging to be made fun of. So here’s a mock commercial touting the benefits of the speeding cameras (1MB mp3 file).